The Laws of Human Nature - Highlights

Annotations

• observing one or two facial expressions that seem to go against what the person is saying or indicate some additional information

• Some people are naturally quiet and reserved, their facial expression revealing this. Some are more animated and energetic, while still others continually wear an anxious look

• Sit in a café or some public space, and without the burden of having to be involved in a conversation, observe the people around you. Listen in on their conversations for vocal cues. Take note of walking styles and overall body language. If possible, take notes

• Notice how often and when you tend to put on a fake smile, or how your body registers nervousness—in your voice, the drumming of your fingers, the twiddling with your hair, the quivering of your lips, and so on.

• If you suspect someone of feeling envy, talk about the latest good news for you without appearing to brag. Look for microexpressions of disappointment on their face

• lay a trap for people, intentionally stirring their hostility and goading them into some aggressive action that will embarrass them in the long run

• Those who are powerful will feel allowed to look around more at others, choosing to make eye contact with whomever they please.

• Real events involve sudden random intrusions and accidents. Reality is messy and the pieces rarely fit so perfectly

• When you are lying, if you skillfully put in something not quite ordinary, something eccentric, something, you know, that never has happened, or very rarely, it makes the lie sound much more probable

• Not invisible but unnoticed, Watson. You did not know where to look, and so you missed all that was important

• people never do something just once. They will inevitably repeat their behavior

• of course we know the addicts who get out of their addiction, only to fall back in or find some other form of addiction.

• You must take notice of any salient forms of behavior—disappearing when there is too much stress, not completing an important piece of work, turning suddenly belligerent when challenged, or, conversely, suddenly rising to the occasion when given responsibility

• people never do something just once.

• they will often repeat actions when it is completely against their self-interest, revealing the compulsive nature of their weaknesses.

• If they are late in finishing simple assignments, they will be late with larger projects. If they become irritated by little inconveniences, they will tend to crumble under larger ones. If they are forgetful on small matters and inattentive to details, they will be so on more important ones

• They go through life resenting this and wanting others to give them things without their having to ask.

• they learned that the only way to get love and attention that lasted was to enmesh their parents in their troubles and problems, which had to be large enough to engage the parents emotionally over time

• deliberately take on tasks slightly above your level

• all somewhat vague, elusive, and taboo

• Do not swallow the easy moralism of the day, which urges honesty at the expense of desirability.

• If some object or person was not desired by others, we tended to see it as something indifferent or distasteful—there must be something wrong with it.

• create the impression that others desire you

• Your silence or lack of overt direction of the message will allow people to run wild with their own stories and interpretations.

Number of annotations:: 24